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Past
Stories by Donna Lopez, founder of FYJ 2009: Mar '09: From restlessness to peace 2008: Jun '08: While waiting for the sunset, Feb '08: Love in the desert, Jan '08: The way you want it 2006/2007:
Dec
'07: Becoming selfish, Jul '07: Yes to your
joy, Jan '07: The power of you, 2005:
Dec
'05: Surfing at Sunset, Nov
'05: Courage to seek lifeguards 2004:
Dec '04: Back to the beach,
Oct '04: Happiness...Sunsets at the beach!,
Aug '04: Familiar lessons
 From
restlessness to peace
Restlessness
and discontent are the first necessities of progress."
"Peace.It does not mean to be in a place where there is no noise, trouble or hard work. It means to be in the midst of those things and still be calm in your heart." -unknown Admittedly, my unrelenting desire for change does get to me at times. Although I very much understand the concept of enjoying the journey, I do often wish that I could just be settled for awhile before the next wave of restlessness drives me to seek out what is next for me. I wish I could simply relish in the way things are right now! I used to think I was the only one with that restlessness within. I used to wonder what was wrong with me, always wanting more, different, better… It seemed, while everyone else was living “happily ever after”, I was always changing, changing, changing. Even these days, I still feel that way from time to time. However, I know I am not the only one that feels the way I feel. In fact, I am not even one of the few. Rather, I believe most of us have those feelings. We all want more, different, better… Although it’s hard to believe, it’s been about six years since I began this “For Your Journey” journey. I’ve talked to hundreds of people and have heard the same stories over and over. Generally, we all feel similar in that—there must be more than this. Where I come from in my writing/teaching/coaching is completely personal. I don’t know how to come from any other place than my own feelings, thoughts and ideas. While this leaves me quite vulnerable to everyone knowing my business, it seems greatly helpful to others. I’ve accepted this as part of my life role, so my sharing continues… Since leaving my “normal” career back in 2003, I have traveled quite a bumpy path. I’ve experienced the excitement of creating a business, the joy of being able to help so many people, the difficulty of deciding which next steps to take, the uncertainty of whether I was making good choices, the ups and downs and questions of why I was even taking this journey, and so on. Yep, a bumpy road it’s been! When I’m at peace, it all seems to make sense. I feel strongly that this is exactly the road I was supposed to take. I know in my heart that this is a time I will look back upon someday and be very proud of all that I was able to do. Through it all, however, I do sometimes find myself just wanting to go back to an easier life. I want to be one of those people who appear to be living that “happily ever after”. I don’t necessarily mean married, rather living a life where there’s no pressure to do anything different than how they’ve set up their life to be. Life just seems constant. And so, I try that. I try going back to a job where they tell me what to do, tell me whether or not I’m doing a good job (I always do a good job!) and pay me accordingly. It’s ok, just ok. However, it is not ok for long! The desire for more, different, better… always comes rushing back to me. I recognize that feeling. I know what it’s telling me. I understand what I need to do. And when I begin doing it, I begin to find myself at peace again! My life is forever changing. A cousin of mine once told me I had “gypsy blood”, like my dad. He was always changing his life as well. I don’t know that what my dad and I had/have is gypsy blood (whatever that means.) Rather, I’d like to believe we're inspired with courage—courage to follow that guidance within which tells us there is more, different, better… for a fulfilled life! There is nothing wrong with following that which brings us back to peace. In fact, it is necessary. I’ve never left the “For Your Journey” journey but I am here with a renewed passion. There’s much work to do to ensure as many of us are living as happy of a life as possible. I will do my part and you will do yours… for my journey and for your journey!  While
waiting for the sunset
"Life
is now. There was never a time when your life was not now, "You
must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, A few years ago, on a coastal trip home from Southern California, I noticed the sun would be setting soon, and so I asked my friend who was traveling with me if she would like to stop at a beach to watch the sunset. She agreed it would be a nice idea, so we quickly found a place to pull over and park. As I was sitting on the rocky shore I felt myself anxiously awaiting the event—the sunset. There was still a bit of time to go and so I looked around wondering what to do with my time. As I usually do with my camera when I’m at the ocean, I simply start taking pictures of whatever is around me. I was just killing time. “Killing” time? Why didn’t I simply enjoy those moments, before the sunset? I find that many people (including myself) spend lots of time in the waiting-for-the-event period. We’re focused on the future, waiting for something we think is more important, to happen. And in the meantime, forget to notice the very moment we are currently in. As I looked back through the pictures I took on that day while waiting for the sun to set, I realized there was so much going on in those moments. The rocks, the ocean waves, the sky, and the beautiful colors they all were at that time. There was so much beauty in that moment. And did I really even take it all in as much as I could have? The future events we spend so much time thinking about are actually only a short amount of time in comparison to our whole lives. What about all the time leading up to those events? What about the journey? This is what’s important. This is where our joy comes from. This is what our life is. Now.
When you are missing out on this moment because you think a future moment will be better, or when life feels hectic and overwhelming, simply bring your attention back to this moment. This moment is not less than, or even hectic or overwhelming actually. Only your anticipation of the future event makes it appear to be so. Enjoy the moment you’re in right now. The sunset will come soon enough. “When we love, it is not necessary to understand what is happening outside, because everything happens inside us instead.” – Paulo Coelho “Love is looking at the same mountains from different angles.” – Paulo Coelho “The
moment we set off in search of love, it sets off in search of us.
And saves us.” As with most people I suppose, there are times when I focus more of my attention on a specific area of my life. Sometimes I am more focused on my business, sometimes my relationships, sometimes my health, etc. While all areas of my life are important, I find it fun to make a concentrated effort to understand more of one area at a time. It’s like taking classes in an interesting subject at school! One of the areas I’ve been looking at recently is regarding the love in my life. I realized there are times when I feel less loved than at other times. So as I often do when I’m wondering about something, I started asking questions. Am I actually less loved at certain times than at other times? Would knowing that a certain number of people loved me make me feel better? Is there a certain depth of love I need from others? Or do I simply need a certain kind of love (family love, friendship love, or romantic love)? What criteria of love would make me normal? “Normal” love! Well, if people already have a hard time describing love as it is, I’m sure it is simply impossible to identify “normal love”. So I certainly won’t try. In fact, I don’t even have much desire to be normal, so what kind of answers was I seeking anyway? Well, this is what showed up for me as a result of my attempt at understanding… I am very happy at this point in my life. I already know that all the different types of love in my life are available to me at any point in which I want to access them. It is not the inaccessibility of love that I feel when I feel less loved, rather my lack of appreciation for myself and the love that is already around me that makes me less than fulfilled. Self-love is the most important love there is. Not loving ourselves first and foremost creates a need for others to satisfy that void. But it’s difficult for others to do that. I have been on both ends of trying to satisfy that need. As the one trying to fill someone else’s void, it’s very energy draining. And as the one needing someone else to fill my void, I became too dependent while still feeling unsatisfied.
To me, sensing a lack of love can be as unfulfilling as that trip to the desert. It leaves me wondering where the life is. However, as I think about who I am, the joyful life I’ve created for myself, the family who loved me from the moment I was born, to the child who I loved from before she was even born, to the many friends who I love and who love me in return, to the romantic partners I have been blessed to share my life with, I began to realize that it is only up to me to shine the sun on my desert. All the love is available at any time. And that love is abundant. I am the one who has the access to all the love I give and the power to attract all the love I want to receive, simply by remembering to appreciate what I know is already there—love… even in the desert.  The
way you want it "In oneself lies the whole world and if you know how to look and learn, the door is there and the key is in your hand. Nobody on earth can give you either the key or the door to open, except yourself." - J. Krishnamurti "This life is yours: Take the power to choose what you want to do and do it well. Take the power to love what you want in life and love it honestly. Take the power to control your own life. No one else can do it for you. Take the power to make your life happy." - Susan Polis Schutz I have written before about a thought that came to me nearly two years ago on one morning as I was waking up. The thought was, "The world is yours and you can have it any way you want it." That type of thought must have come through my guidance. After all, there's very little thinking in the morning coming from this night owl! Anyway, that thought which came to me that morning made a significant impact on my life. Since that morning, I made decisions based on that thought which took me on quite an amazing journey. Believing that I can have my world however I wanted it gave me the courage to take action in areas where I had previously just been waiting for something to happen. The reason I'm mentioning this again though, is because as this New Year came, that sentence came back to me. Actually, it's always been with me. But for some reason lately (ok, maybe because I was thinking about something I was unhappy about), it kept repeating in my head. So as I thought more about it, I had an additional realization in regards to how my life is today. I realized that if the world IS mine and I can have it any way I want it, then how my life is now must be how I have been wanting it. My life today is how I have been wanting it? Not in every way. Not anymore anyway. In fact, I'm currently making my new intentions (or resolutions) for how I want my upcoming year to be. And there are definitely areas of my life that I want to be improved or to be different. So moving forward, is this still how I want my world to be? This is why self-empowerment is so valuable in life. Empowerment is victimless. If I believe I chose my life (my world) as it is now, then it's easy to imagine that I have the power to create it differently if I so choose. MY WORLD IS MINE. And YOUR WORLD IS YOURS. I'm excited because I know how I want mine to be going forward. Do you know how you want yours to be? We can set intentions any day, but this is a good time. It's a New Year. It's a convenient time to think about how you want your life to be. Take on the idea that your world can be any way you want it. Take on the idea that you have the power to create that life you want. Use this time to make the choices and begin taking actions that will create the life you want. What do you have to lose? At minimum, you will gain self-empowerment, and at most... your world... the way you want it!  Becoming
selfish "You
have no idea how promising the world begins to look once you have
decided "Our true passions are selfish." – Stendhal Life for me has always had this way of changing big time! Over the last year or so, my life has changed quite a bit (again). My daughter is grown and has since moved out on her own. It’s been a very different time for me, especially because I was so young when I married and had my daughter, and so I have never really experienced being completely on my own until this past year. Now, I find so much more time to do my own thing. I moved into a smaller place, spend money only on myself, hang out with friends often, date much more, etc. At first I was a little apprehensive about how this life change would affect me. Would I feel a loss of purpose? After all, although I’ve been divorced for a long time and have always been very independent, it seems that I’ve been a mother practically my whole life! I’ve always had this child to care for, and although she has grown up to be just as independent as me, being a mother is still one of the biggest parts of my identity. She simply doesn’t need me as much these days. And so here I find myself now, just Donna! Surprisingly,
this is a very exciting time for me though. Although I will continue
to be a mother, I feel happier than I’ve ever felt because
I am now learning what it feels like to be selfish. I realized that
becoming selfish, thinking only about what I really want, is actually
a very empowering thing. I have never thought before that being
selfish is such an essential part of empowerment, but now I definitely
do. Not only mothers, but most of us give so much to things outside
of ourselves. We don’t call in sick for work because the job
needs us. We go to family functions even when we may not want to
because we think it’s an obligation. We say yes to our friends
even when we want to say no. The list goes on and on. We simply
do many things we don’t want to do. Well, I admit that these days it is much easier for me to be selfish because all of my time is my own. But I believe that simply saying yes to things I do want and saying no to things I don’t want could have been helpful to the quality of my life a long time ago as well. Selfish is not a bad word. Selfish is not a matter of morality. Being selfish means you are taking care of yourself so that you can be as happy as you can be. You don’t hurt anyone when you are taking care of your own needs. Oh I know, you’re thinking of ways to disagree with me right now! That’s ok, because in thinking about this topic, I also thought about ways where someone’s decisions may possibly hurt someone else. However, when you do what is best for YOU, you are taking care of yourself. And that is YOUR life purpose. Your purpose in life is to be in full joy. And if you are hurting someone, then you are probably not in full joy. So I am not defining selfish as neglecting others. What I am saying is that focusing on more of what you want will bring you more peace, freedom, and happiness. And when you have those things, those around you have the opportunity to benefit from them as well. If there were no people on this earth, I believe that it would still thrive--possibly in more harmony than it does now. Plants and animals are selfish by nature. They take what they need, not out of cruelty, but because they seek what they need to thrive. And isn’t thriving what we want for our own lives? Live the way you want to live. Be with the people you want to be with. Do the job you want to do. Spend your time doing only that which makes you happy. You don’t owe your life to anyone else, so go ahead, and be selfish!  Yes
to your joy
“If
the sight of the blue skies fills you with joy, if a blade of grass
springing up in the fields has power to move you, if the simple
things of nature have a message that you understand, rejoice, for
your soul is alive...”
“Let
a joy keep you. Reach out your hands and take it when it runs by.” As I write this today, I am coming from a place of pure joy. How do I know this? How did I get here? Well, first off, it is very easy to identify when I am not in joy. I feel tired, bored, upset, or maybe simply restless. Something is uneasy within me, and even when I cannot identify the source of that uneasiness, I know I don’t feel as good as I could. Thus, not in joy. As for how I got here, well, this is a bit harder to explain – although it’s not hard to understand. The reason it’s not hard to understand is because I believe we all feel it from time to time. Certainly, some feel it more often than others, but that doesn’t mean those who feel joy less often cannot become one who feels it more often. This is what I want you to understand – that joy is available to us at anytime and for as much as we really want it. Discovering joy for yourself should be your number one priority in life. We live in a society which values putting many things before one’s own happiness. Really though, all those things we put ahead of joy – all of the responsibilities we are working so hard to accomplish – are intended to make us get to that place of joy. But why wait for those things to be completed before we actually get the benefit of feeling the joy? As you may know from my countless beach stories, I love to go to the beach at sunset. I don’t go nearly as often as I’d like because I choose to do so many other things as well. And although I can be at the beach in a bit over a half hour, the time it takes to get ready, drive there, hang out for awhile, then drive home totals a few hours at least. There are many other things I can do with that time. But going to the beach is often a priority for me. Why? Simply because it brings me joy. I don’t wait for a vacation day or a time when all of my chores are done. I don’t wait until someone wants to go with me. I just go when I want to go. But that is only one source of joy for me. There are countless others. And I discover more every day. All it takes is that moment of uneasiness and I’m seeking out the way to find joy again. I know things happen. I get that sometimes we feel bad and just want to dwell in it for awhile. I do that as well. I’m also a fairly moody person (I know that is hard to believe, ha), so I have ups and downs for seemingly no reason. However, I do not stay in the down as long as I can help it. I refuse for that to be my life. I refuse to feel bad for too long. I’d rather say yes to the joy that I know is always available to me. One day I realized just how easy it is to feel that joy. I was going through a drive-thru restaurant at lunch time. I was in my own world, but they seemed to be taking a long time to get my order so I was a bit impatient. As I got to the window where they were supposed to hand me my food, I noticed that many of the workers were laughing and joking around. In my own bad mood, my first instinct was to get even more frustrated at what I believed to be them wasting my time. But something made me choose a different thought in that moment. I decided to take in their happiness. I decided to think about how happy they all looked and felt happy for them. In an instant, I felt this rush come through my body. It was like a wave of peace washing through my entire body. I instantly felt joy. I had never experienced such a feeling from a thought like I had just had. And from that moment on, I realized just how easy it was to bring joy into my life. Joy is all around us. When we see people laughing, when we see children playing, when we see the beauty of nature, or when we simply sit in our home, look around and see all that we’ve created for ourselves. We have so much to feel happy about. It is just a choice. It is only a matter of saying “yes” to it. And it only takes a second to grab that joy and let it wash through us. Seek it, find it, allow it, and live it. You will be joyous that you did. Have a wonderful summer! Maybe I’ll see you at the beach!  The
power of you
“Your
living is determined not so much by what life brings to you "There
is a place that YOU are to fill that no one else can fill -- As I write this, it happens to be the beginning of a new year. For many, it is a milestone in time that seems to bring a fresh start to plans and ideas. Usually people
make New Year’s resolutions with the hope that whatever it
is they want to make better in their lives, with a bit of dedication,
it can happen. Maybe if we set our minds to it and use a little
willpower we can lose our extra weight or make some more money. I happen to believe, though, that we already do create everything in our lives. It’s just that our willpower and dedication is often unconscious. In fact, we use our willpower to feel, think and talk about things every day—this is how we are actually creating our lives. It seems so effortless, that even if we already understand how it is that we are creating our lives, we often forget just how much power we give to our own experiences. YOU are very powerful. You are so powerful that you have actually created everything that is in your world at this moment. Even if you are thinking there are things in your life that you’d rather not have there, the idea that you are such a powerful creator is actually really good news! The reason this is so great is because when you believe in yourself and in your own power, you then have the ability to access that power within yourself in order to change what you don’t like. More importantly, you can recognize that same ability to create only that which you really do want going forward. For me, this is the most exciting of all! I invite you to take on this idea for yourself for this upcoming year. At the very least, test the idea for your own life so you can see how it works. Make your willpower and dedication conscious. Turn your resolutions into intentions (learn more in my Setting Intentions workshop). Whether you feel good or bad, there is a good chance that you will notice the world reflecting back to you the very thing that validates that feeling. If you think about something, in either a positive or negative way, chances are that you are experiencing the result of that thinking. And, if you are talking about this or that, and repeating this or that, you will see this or that showing up in your life. This month I chose my picture of this fountain to represent your beautifully created life. You are so unique that you have the ability to create all that which flows from you. And in your uniqueness there are ideas, dreams, and abilities that can only come from you. You decide what kind of life you want. Be proud of yourself and use your power to be all that you can be. Forget regrets or things you could have done differently in the past. It’s a new year—your year. Take this time to feel excited, think about what you’d like to create, and talk about it as though it will happen for you. Wishing you
the happiest 2007,  Deciding
where to look
“The truly important things in life—love, beauty, and one’s own uniqueness—are constantly being overlooked.” ~ Pablo Casals A few weeks ago, my mom was visiting here from Denver and I took her to my favorite beach. As we sat there talking and looking out at the ocean waves I got a bit restless for my usual photo session. However, I realized that any pictures I would take as I sat there staring at the ocean would pretty much look like all the rest I had taken on previous trips. So, I picked up my camera and twisted around to take a shot directly behind me. I instantly noticed the contrast between my usual ocean pictures and the whole world of beauty that lie just behind me. When I got home I took some time to look at my picture. I noticed so many different things going on all at once. Among them, the sand, the driftwood, the shadow of the driftwood, the cliffs, the trees, the hills way in the background, the beautiful clear blue sky, and if you look carefully in the upper right hand corner, even a bird flying by. Much more was also going on that couldn’t be picked up by the camera, such as the sounds, the feel of the sand and the sun as I sat there, as well as the fresh air smell. Actually, so many things were happening at the same time it would be impossible to name them all. This is life—many things happening at once. We can choose to look at the whole thing like a beautiful picture, including what some of the other senses pick up as well. Or we can choose to just look at one or two things at a time. For me, I sometimes find myself focusing only on those one or two things, while losing sight of the whole beautiful life picture. Honestly, I may even spend more time noticing less important things, such as the shadow of the driftwood or the bird that has flown by. It’s true. Why am I focusing on the darkness of the shadow when the sun is shining on so much more around me? Or why am I still thinking of the bird that is no longer even in the picture? In life, the bird could represent an event, a person, or a feeling that is no longer even there (it’s flown away). But, I just keep thinking about it as though it’s still in the picture! I do this. No wonder I find myself not as happy as I could be at times. Does it happen to you? We have a choice. We sometimes forget that it is our decision of where to look or where to focus our attention in the situations of our lives. The more we focus only on those things which are only a fraction of the entire beauty of our lives, the more we may find ourselves in a less than happy state. Take some time to look at the entire beauty of your life. Decide to look at the whole picture and spend some extra time focusing on those best parts of your life. The less-than-perfect parts may still be in the picture, but when you focus on the areas that bring you the most happiness, the more gratitude you will feel and remember to have for your life. This was my realization for the month, so as I share it, may it help you to remember to enjoy the beauty of your journey as well!  Facing
the direction of the sunset
"Things which matter most must never be at the mercy of things which matter least." – Goethe Having been born and raised on the west coast, and not being a morning person by nature, I think it’s appropriate that watching the sunset is one of my favorite events. And if you follow my stories with any regularity, you may know that watching the sunset at the beach is even more so my favorite thing to do. Since I live more than a half hour away from the beach though, I obviously don’t get to see the sun set in the ocean every day. More often than not I am closer to home when the sun goes down. Despite my location however, whenever I am out during this time of day, I still find myself stopping to notice the sun setting. It’s just one of my things I guess. I think my life purpose is like the sunset in way. It’s out there, and if I pay attention I will notice that it always happens to be guiding me to face the same direction. My current location doesn’t matter as long as I turn towards it. Whenever one begins to notice the deeper feelings within oneself, it is hard to deny what’s calling you. When I left my “normal” career to follow the path to For Your Journey, I knew my life purpose was much bigger than I had originally sensed when I was the 22 year-old starting her accounting career back in 1989. I finally realized there was more for me to do in the world and everything that I had experienced (and continue to experience) in my life up to the point of making my life transition was the perfect preparation for the awareness to my journey's purpose. As I created For Your Journey, I thought it was supposed to look like a retail store with classes and workshops. That was only temporary though. Then, I thought it was supposed to be a smaller space with empowerment workshops. That seemed to be temporary as well. Suddenly I felt as though I was losing sense of what was next so I decided to take a break and look to the direction of the “real” world again. I took a simple
desk job and found myself back in the cubicle. In just a few short
days, I had already realized that I didn’t belong there. I
was ignoring the inner voice that was calling me to stay on my path,
and as a result my life began to feel quite meaningless. What was
I to do though? I needed money and for some reason it seemed better
to sacrifice the business for the security of a paycheck. After
four months of excruciating boredom though, I knew I had to leave
the job. For Your Journey is simply “me” these days. Although it doesn’t look like anything or reside in any physical location at the moment, it definitely does have a purpose. Now, I am no longer choosing to sacrifice the meaning of it for anything less. And the reason why I share my experiences in these short stories is to help you understand that you have a sunset as well. When you don’t take the time to notice it, things begin feeling less than meaningful. But when you face it, regardless from where you stand, you simply begin to feel better. May you find your own sunset, face the direction towards it, and feel the peace you deserve on your journey.  Beautifully
gloomy days
“Your work is to discover your world and then with all your heart give yourself to it.” ~Buddha I woke up one morning with this thought in my head, “The world is yours and you can have it any way that you want it.” I always pay attention to the thoughts I have when I first wake up, because I know I don’t consciously think of them the same way I think about other things during the day. After all, I’m quite groggy in the morning and wouldn’t really have time to come up with such deep insight so easily. During that day I wondered why that message came to me. I had been a bit unclear about things that were going on in my life at that point, but I am always wondering what my life is all about. So that didn’t really help me in understanding this particular thought for the day. I did, however, begin to think about the choices I was making for myself personally. If this world was mine and I could have it any way that I wanted it, was there more that I wanted? Yes, of course there’s more, I thought. Within the following weeks, I began to take notice of “my world” in a new way – when I was worried about things, when I was doing things that took too much energy, and where in my life I felt most unfulfilled. Being a caretaker by nature, I decided to take on the idea that I would try being a bit selfish. I was going to spend more time thinking about me and wanted to see if anything would change as a result. I took some action in areas of my life where I felt something was lacking. I decided that if I wanted certain things in my life, then I would do what it took to make them happen. My life was not even bad. In fact, I think it was better than it’s ever been. But there was more that I wanted, and I wanted to see what was possible. This began a new journey for me, creating my world and the way that I wanted it. Things started to change. My requests began to become fulfilled quite easily. In fact, it was as though the Universe was simply waiting for me to ask for what I wanted. My new attitude brought new things to me that I barely even dreamed of before that morning thought. I began seeing my world differently and feeling more empowered, and the beauty of my life became even more visible to me than before. With my newly discovered self-empowerment, I decided that I really wanted to go to my favorite beach. With record-breaking rainy days last month though, it seemed so difficult to pick a day to go. I was waiting for a nice day. However, there wasn’t a nice day to be seen in the forecast. So, even though it was raining I finally decided to go to anyway. It was a gloomy day for sure. In fact, there were very few people out there. But I went with the thought in my head that this was my world, and my way would be to have a nice day in it. And a really nice day it was. I took some time to get out and walk a bit. With the weather so bad, I didn’t stay long. However, I was very happy to be there. It was fun and it felt good having made the decision that although it was a gloomy day, it was also a beautiful day. That was the choice I made for my world. How is your world? If you had the choice for it to be any way that you wanted, how would it be? Take the time to notice, and if your world is not everything you want it to be, make the choices to create it to be. We all deserve the best world we can imagine. And whenever we take steps to create what we want, we are empowered. Here’s to your beautifully gloomy days… Donna  The
courageous flower
"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom." ~Anais Nin A couple of Sunday's ago, as I was out running errands, I began thinking how fast the weekend was flying by. Although I was proud of all I was able to accomplish that day, I felt a bit disappointed as I noticed the day becoming darker. It was a typical January weekend, so with less daylight and the mildly rainy weather, maybe the time just seemed shorter than it actually was. Feeling the need to end my running around, I decided to go some place I could enjoy the few remaining daylight moments of my fading weekend. I decided to stop at The Rosegarden on my way home; a very lovely park when the roses are in season. While I knew there wouldn’t be any roses during this time of year, I thought I’d just hang out at the fountain for a bit. After all, it has been awhile since I’ve been to the beach so I guess a nice water fountain would do fine on this winter Sunday. As I arrived
I couldn’t help but notice how different the park looked.
Although it is close to my home I never realized that I must only
visit the park when the roses are in season, because I was definitely
struck by the lack of usual vibrancy. Because there are so many
rose bushes planted there, when the roses are blooming, the park
is just so beautiful. During this time of year the bushes are all
pruned down to stumpy little brown sticks. With the bushes cut down to nothing though, it was still very nice being in that park that Sunday evening. After spending some time at the fountain I began strolling around when something bright caught my eye. Were those roses I see? Yep, but just a few! It seemed as though these few flowers forgot that it was winter (some, the only ones on their bush, and most fading fast). I could imagine these little flowers working so hard to bloom, only to end up wondering where all the rest of their friends were! Once I had noticed these few roses I definitely had to take a closer look. What a strange sight to see these few bloomers among such scarcity. Then I noticed this one (seen in my picture above). It was a bud... a bud beginning to open up to the world. Did someone forget to tell it that it was a gloomy January evening? Why was it so determined to open up now? (I know... it may actually be closing for the evening, but this is my interpretation!) Honestly, I don’t really know anything about rose bushes. Maybe there are certain types that open up during this time of year. Regardless of my lack of knowledge of roses however, I was still very pleased to have this experience. I began to think about my own experiences in a similar way to these roses who decided to bloom in the winter. I often do what I want, when I want. And just like a rose who decides to open up when all the others are waiting it out, I often find myself taking action in my life when others seem to be waiting something out as well. For sure, this way of thinking or what some view as my courageous attitude didn’t come naturally to me. It certainly wasn’t an early trait of mine either. I actually chose this way of living after many years of fighting against it. Being raised in a non-traditional family, as far back as I can remember, all I wanted was to have a “normal” life. As I grew to the age where I could make my own decisions, I tried hard to only make decisions that would lead me to what I thought was that “normal” life. I wanted what others had and I wanted to do what others did. I wanted to bloom in just the right season along with the rest of the roses. But after many years of working so hard to achieve that normal life without ever gaining the satisfaction I thought it would bring me, I decided to let go of some of those unrealistic dreams. As I began to discover more about myself, I realized my true-self needed to be unique. I needed to have a life that was natural for me. I needed to create experiences that made me happy, just for happiness sake. Living just to try to fit in didn’t feel right anymore. Now, just like
the rose, I decide to bloom whenever I want. Sometimes it happens
to be springtime and there are many more roses along side me. And
other times it is fall or winter when there are only a few. Don’t be afraid to be one of those rose buds blooming on a gloomy Sunday evening either. Be a courageous flower! You can never really make a wrong choice or waste your time. And there is always a purpose unfolding for you just like for the rose. Just imagine, if it weren’t for this courageous little bud, deciding to bloom now, I wouldn’t have had such a fun realization and you wouldn’t have had the pleasure of seeing its pretty picture! Follow your own dreams in your own time. Don’t wait for the perfect time, the perfect opportunity or when you have enough money. It is the right time when you sense inspiration, any opportunity may be the perfect opportunity, and there is always enough money when you decide there is enough. Quite simply, anything is possible when you decide it is your time to bloom!  The
sensation of abundance
"Abundance is not something we acquire. It is something we tune into." ~Dr. Wayne Dyer One of my favorite reasons for teaching empowerment is that I am easily reminded when I am not practicing what I teach. Actually, there are no secrets to what I teach. Nothing is new. I just talk about what is true for me, and I think that is why so many of my students agree with what I say. If what I talk about resonates with them, they already know it to be true for themselves as well—it's just human nature to need the inspiration when we forget. Well, I often need to be reminded as well. This new year, I had already planned that I would begin with the topic of abundance. I already know how to think about abundance. I already know how to set an intention so that I could receive all the abundance I want. Yet, why don’t I have all that I want? It occurred to me today, as I was arguing with my daughter over money, that looking at the lack instead of possibilities is sooo easy. In fact, when my daughter and I resolved our disagreement, I confessed to her that I was now going to have a hard time writing about what I had planned for this month. So I took some quiet time to think about it a bit more, and this is what came to me. One of the reasons we forget that life is abundant is because we fear lack. We fear that there is not enough of something and we begin focusing on that which we fear. However, the more we focus on it, the more we are creating that which we are focusing on. This I know. But how do we stop focusing on the fears? We must take the time to stop the thoughts. Of course, it is hard to simply stop the thoughts when you have no new thoughts to replace them with. And I know it is hard to just change your mind and suddenly think you will have an abundance of something when you don’t have it at the moment. However, one way to change your thoughts is by taking the time to sense abundance. Abundance is everywhere. Maybe it’s not in something that you like, for example, when the ants take over your kitchen. But you know there is an abundance of ants in the world! What about your closets? Do you have a packed closet like I do? Don’t think about how many of those clothes you still like, or how many fit you. Simply think about how abundant you are to have so many. This past weekend, we had an abundance of rain. I know it caused some people problems, but that is not really my point. My point is that there IS abundance in the world. So much so that you can actually see it, taste it, smell it, hear it, touch it and even sense it! There are no lack of television shows, ice cream cones, hot coffee's, love songs, or sand at the beach! Even if you don’t see or have it personally, it doesn’t mean that there is a lack of it. Therefore, if it is possible that this world is filled with so many of those things I just mentioned, isn’t it also possible that the things you want in the world are in abundance as well? Then, if so, isn't it possible there is enough for you too? I happen to believe so. Last week I
watched the television show “20/20”. It featured reporter
John Stossel debunking the top ten myths and lies believed by the
American public. This story happened to be very refreshing to me.
In the show, Stossel explained how it is a myth that we actually
have less free time these days. We just happen to fill up our free
time with so many other time consumers. Now, I can imagine people wouldn’t believe everything Stossel said. However, the reason the story was so interesting to me was because it reminded me how we find so many ways to worry about lack. We are so blessed to live in this country, in this world, in this universe, but our attention so easily often goes to what we don’t have. My new year intention—to focus on my abundance. This will allow me to attract more of what I want, by putting my attention on abundance, rather than on lack. Then maybe when the weather is better, I will go back to the beach and pick up as much sand as I can carry, just to remind myself how abundant the world really is. In the meantime, I am going to clean my room. I have such an abundance of stuff in there, I’m sure it messes up the feng shui! Have a very happy and abundant new year. And don’t forget to set your intention to live the life you love.
Personal Growth, Mind Body Spirit, Community, Creativity - San Jose, Santa Clara, Campbell, Cupertino - For Your Journey |
Sitting
at the beach in any moment of any day, for me, is the best. I am
filled with feelings that life is wonderful—which is easy
to do in such a beautiful place. However, when I’m sitting
at my computer late at night, wondering what I will do tomorrow,
I miss the similar feelings I’d get if I was at the beach.
I sometimes forget that this moment is just as wonderful. It’s
wonderful because it is Now. And it is my life. In this
very moment I have peace and quiet. Regardless of what tomorrow
brings, this moment is perfect. And I want to enjoy it.
For
me, going to the desert is not exactly an ideal destination spot.
While some people love it and get very energized by the desert,
I am an ocean person (obvious, if you know a little about me) as
I find that I get my energy when I’m at the beach. So on one
of my few trips to the desert, I found myself fairly unsatisfied
with my surroundings. I wondered what people loved about it. To
me it seemed so lifeless. That is, until the sun began to set. Suddenly
everything began looking different. The mountains reflected the
pink in the sunset, and the dead brush and cactus seemed to light
up before my eyes.
Whatever
the timing though, my life is wondrous and it never ceases to amaze
me. 
He
explained how we actually have more trees today than 100 years ago,
despite our worries that we are cutting them all down. He also argued
that over-population is not a problem because we have more than
enough land and today have the ability to grow more than enough
food.